Halloween Status Updates for Facebook and Twitter

Funny "Halloween" Status Updates for Facebook and Twitter

Here's what we got so far (add yours as a comment) :

John...

• plans on dressing up as Kanye West for Halloween and just before the kids yell "Trick or Treat", jump out of the bushes and yell "Christmas is better".
• wants to remind you this Halloween, that as a general rule, don't solve riddles that open portals to Hell.
• warns you this Halloween to beware of strangers bearing strange tools like chainsaws, staple guns, hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, and band saws.
• will have on his tomb stone, "See I told you I was SICK!"
• is going to dress up as Kanye West and show up at Taylor Swift's house this Halloween.
• hopes this Halloween, he doesn't end up with a bag full of restraining orders again.
• wonders if he's getting old, or if others also ask for high fibre candy only on Halloween?
• forgot to buy candy for the kids this Halloween but will offer them a bite of his sandwich.
• hopes nobody else dresses up as Justus von Liebig, Father of biochemistry who recorded minerals in plant ash and proposed the law of minimum.
• wonders if Lady Gaga dresses up as a normal person for Halloween???

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Famous Quotes

• Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.
• There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world.
• Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special.
• I'll bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.
• Ghosts, like ladies, never speak till spoke to.
• On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.
• This Halloween the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him.
• A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween.
• Eye of newt, and toe of frog, Wool of bat, and tongue of dog, Adder's fork, and blind-worm's sting, Lizard's leg, and owlet's wing, For a charm of powerful trouble, Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
• I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what they think of me?

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