Friday, 30 October 2009

Funny Status Updates about Children for Facebook and Twitter

Facebook Status Updates about Children, Kids and Teens which you can use!

  • In automobile terms, the child supplies the power but the parents have to do the steering.
  • There are only two things a child will share willingly; communicable diseases and its mother's age.
  • I love kids. I was a kid myself, once.
  • I've got seven kids. The three words you hear most around my house are 'hello,' 'goodbye,' and 'I'm pregnant
  • Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.
  • When I was born my father spent three weeks trying to find a loophole in my birth certificate.
  • Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive?
  • When my husband comes home, if the kids are still alive, I figure I've done my job.
  • Your sons weren't made to like you. That's what grandchildren are for.
  • Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
  • Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
  • The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant--and let the air out of the tires. Each generation has been an education for us in different ways. The first child-with-bloody-nose was rushed to the emergency room. The fifth child-with-bloody-nose was told to go to the yard immediately and stop bleeding on the carpet.
  • When you are 12, you no longer need the parents.
  • A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm.
  • Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.
  • Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.
  • Children ask better questions than adults. "May I have a cookie?" "Why is the sky blue?" and "What does a cow say?" are far more likely to elicit a cheerful response than "Where's your manuscript?" Why haven't you called?" and "Who's your lawyer?"
  • Do not, on a rainy day, ask your child what he feels like doing, because I assure you that what he feels like doing, you won't feel like watching.

Funny, Clever, Witty Children Facebook Status Updates
Note: these are famous Quotes


Anonymous said...

These are good! Here are some more.

Anonymous said...

No phone, and No going out for awhile...Gaining my moms trust back is like trying to gain Hitler's trust back when your a jew.

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Karl said...

Thanks for the smile on my face! Enjoyed your collection! Normally I always reead the posts on

Perhaps you also integrate a possibility where I can insert my funny status :D
Best regards and thanks a lot!

Paula Lewis said...

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Anonymous said...


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