Monday, 12 October 2009

Funny Christmas Status Updates for Facebook and Twitter


"Christmas Status" - Funny Statuses, Facebook Christmas Status, Christmas Statuses, Funny Facebook, and Witty Status Updates for Facebook and Twitter

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Here's what we got so far (add yours as a comment) :

John...
  1. What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
  2. The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
  3. Christmas is just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
  4. Christmas Status, Funny Christmas Facebook Status
  5. Did you ever notice that life seems to follow certain patterns? Like I noticed that every year around this time, I hear Christmas music.
  6. I am buying my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included.
  7. Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present
  8. Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking?"
  9. Let me see if I've got this Santa business straight. You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn't laundering illegal drug money?
  10. Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.
  11. can't wait to watch his favourite Christmas movie, "The Christmas That Almost Wasn't Due To Santa's Urinary Tract Infection"
  12. is looking forward to the new Christmas special, "A Creepy, Creepy Christmas with Michael Jackson"
  13. may not be the real Santa, but that doesn't mean I haven't seen you while you're sleeping.
  14. Christmas Status, Funny Christmas Facebook Status
  15. is chugging NyQuil until sugar plums really are dancing in my head
  16. is making "fruitcakes" out of stuff I find under my sofa cushions.
  17. is eating her weight in figgy pudding
  18. is inviting you to tickle her Elmo.
  19. hated Christmas! The whole Christmas season! Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason.
  20. Christmas Status, Funny Christmas Facebook Status
  21. is still trying to figure out what "police nabbed my dad" has to do with Christmas.
  22. wonders that if Christmas, Father's Day and birthdays did not exist, then aftershave too, would not exist.



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40 comments:

Anonymous said...

silllyyyyyyyyyy, something really funny plz!!

Anonymous said...

it's not just the weather outside that's frightful. Have you been to the mall lately?

Anonymous said...

He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake, his name is Edward Cullen so get ready to be raped

Anonymous said...

is going to slide down your chimney tonight. wink wink.

Anonymous said...

kicked an elf today

Elixir said...

There are a bunch of funny Christmas status updates at:

http://facebookstatus.blogspot.com/search/label/Christmas

Anonymous said...

joy to the world santa has comed *wink wink* let earth recieve the baby!!!

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Dear Santa,
Define naughty.......,,..

Anonymous said...

Came home last night to find my doors smashed in and everything gone!... What bastard does that to an advent calender???

Anonymous said...

santa is a pervert. he watches you all year to see if your naughty.

girl said...

When my virtual diary didnt work my mum said that santa works in agros .... she returned it :(

Anonymous said...

Dashing through the snow, On a pair of broken skis, All the fields we go, Crashing through the trees! The snow is turning red, I think I'm almost dead, Help me say hi to Santa Claus I'm gonna lose my head.

Anonymous said...

Every year, grandma gets run over by a reindeer. This year, if I leave extra cookies, will Santa aim for my ex instead?

Anonymous said...

not the bestt

how aboutt - "Is on Santas VIP list ;)"

Anonymous said...

just reminding everyone to never eat yellow snow

Anonymous said...

What’s the difference between tiger woods and santa? Santa stopped at 3 ho’s. ;)

Anonymous said...

completed my christmas jigsaw in 6 months this yesr and on the label it sed 2 to 4 years!!!! pretty proud of myself :D

Anonymous said...

I hate Christmas. Whoever is responsible should be nailed to a cross.

Anonymous said...

is excited for Christmas. What other time of the year can you sit around a dead tree and eat candy out of socks?

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